True Recovery

It may sound funny, but I like to create a goal chart for myself.  Just something with all the steps I need to take, and I mark them off as I go.  I find it motivating to watch the chart get closer to the finish line.  After a few of these smaller, long-term goals, pick something a bit more aggressive.  Say a two week vacation somewhere, or taking a class, something that seems a bit more out of reach.  Take the very same approach, define the goal, what we need to accomplish, bite-size pieces, then follow-through.

Relationships

Relationships are valuable, they can be the source of positive experiences, support and love.  We all have damaged or neglected relationships in our lives.  This really includes the full range of relationships, from your spouse or significant other and family to your neighbors, therapist, mechanic, waitress.  Work to strengthen your existing relationship, repair damaged relationships and build new ones.

Existing relationships, especially damaged ones, are each unique.  We have to figure out what we can do to fix or improve those relationships.  A sometimes difficult, but usually very effective thing to do is simply ask that person about themselves, their goals, dreams and desires.  Simply asking and listening can go a long way to improve the bond between the two of you.  While listening, think of small things that you can do that they'll value, don't make promises you can't keep... in fact, you usually don't even have to mention it, but make a note of it, then do something small, but nice for them.  I'd start with good relationships you have, and begin to strengthen them.  Next, I'd work on building new friendships.  Then move to the harder task of repairing damaged relationships.  We'll cover more about how to do this in the Interpersonal Effectiveness module.

Avoid Procrastination

Life is never hopeless.  True, it can feel that way.  There are many nights I couldn't sleep thinking of how my life will never be right; feeling completely overwhelmed.  The good news is, when things are really bad, there's no where to go but up.  But it'll never happen until we start taking steps to make things better.  Each of the things we discuss in this Emotion Regulation module can make a huge impact on our lives, but they won't happen unless we MAKE them happen.  Feeling overwhelmed is completely understandable, but not taking steps to improve life is a decision.

Be Mindful

It's not enough to go through positive experiences.  We've got to actually feel the good in the experience.  I remember, not too long ago, getting a full body massage.  I spent far more money than I had, but I'd been so stressed and thought it would really help.  The odd thing is, I spent the entire massage ruminating over my own worries.  It did help a little, but would have been so much more valuable had I been able to fully appreciate the massage.  Mindfulness is the key.