True Recovery

In this section, we'll discuss a fairly simple tool you may find helpful when tempted to resort to self-destructive or dysfunctional behaviors to cope with the stress.  This is an analytical approach that I personally find helpful to put things in perspective.

We offer this as an on-line worksheet, available in the Worksheet Manager.  If you prefer to do this on paper, write your description (described below) at the top of the paper, then draw a vertical line down the center of the paper, and a horizontal line across the middle, dividing the rest of the paper into four boxes.  Then fill it out as described below.

To use this tool:

• Title (on-line worksheet)— At the top of the worksheet, add a title, this will make it easier for you to find it later.
• Description — Write a brief description of the "trigger" or stressful event that took place.  This can be a simple description like, "my car was stolen", or something far more complex.   Try to keep the description to a minimum.  Remember, you're the only one who will be reading it.
• Tolerate Stress / Pros (upper-left) — list out all the benefits of using the tools you've learned so far to tolerate the stress. Another way to view this is, what do you have to gain by getting through this stressful event without resorting to the self-destructive behaviors that you are tempted to do.  Think about times in the past when other stressful events have passed.  Think about the "light at the end of the tunnel".
• Tolerate Stress / Cons box (upper-right) — list out all the drawbacks of using the tools you've learned so far. Think about things like, "I don't really know them that well."  "I'm not good at them."  "I've had trouble getting them to work."
• Self-destructive / Pros box (lower-left) — list out all the benefits of reaching for your "emotional crutch", meaning doing drugs, drinking, over eating, gambling, going into an angry rage, etc.  Whatever it is you are tempted to do at the moment.  What will you get out of doing that?   How might it help?
• Self-destructive / Cons box (lower-right) — list out all the drawback of reaching for your "emotional crutch".  What sort of repercussions might you have to pay later.  If you do what you're tempted to do?  Might you lose your job or relationship?  Could you be arrested or fail a drug test?  Might you lose your children or your life?
   

It's a pretty straightforward tool that you can use quickly to help you sort things out in your mind and think it all through with wise mind.  This is not Reasonable Mind, since many of the things you may put on your list are related to your emotions and how you feel about them.  You can, of course, read over the list.  I find, however, that just going through the process of writing it all down is helpful to me.